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| Jamie Beck |
Love’s illusion,
Lie’s seclusion.
Smoke’s reflection,
Mirror’s detection.
Truth’s confusion,
Heart’s contusion.
Red lips moist
whisper names.
Brown eyes hide
mascara’s aim.
Beauty spins
roulette’s round game.
Shattered glass reeks of rum.
Starving crows eat stale crumb.
Empty pools curse noon sun.
Love lies.
Smoke hides.
Mirror cries.
Truth dies.
Heart sighs.
Deceitfulness is a beauty I cannot tame.
Why even try?
Love,
you lie.
23 comments:
excellent one shot henry...love the staccato summation,,,the last couple lines almost a sigh of their own...
Stunning - absolutely stunning. :0
this goes bam - bam - bam and i agree with bri at the last lines...somehow reminds me of the eminem rihanna song "love the way you lie"
Oh..and you certainly didn't, Henry!
Your honesty was very well translated into this very fine poem here...
I like your take on love, and I "love" your way with words... no lies about that one!! :)
An excellent write, Henry! I absolutely loved it.
I agree. This goes, pow! Terrific.
I love the line, "empty pools curse noon sun" and I like how the words keep rolling as I read :)
Incredibly powerful...love the rhythm of the words, and the message that we can all get lost in the lure of the lie.
Love... lies, deceit... the worst lies are the ones we tell ourselves... lovely poem... thanks for sharing:)
Henry,
The rat-a-tat pace and respective rhyme schemes provide mood and meaning, along with ideal diction. Heavy with emotion, this one soars.
Brutal in its honesty ... great write!
Brilliant.
impressed.
smiles.
As others have said, I love the flow of this. At this point in life, I'm learning that life's journey is about shattering illusions. BTW, I was so close to choosing your story/poem as story of the week for Bluebell Books. It was just superb. For my tastes I would have gone with it but went with something light since it was for children. It was so good, Henry.
Terrific images in this one. I found it fast paced and exciting. Great writing!
I enjoyed this Henry. Sometimes prefer the lie to the truth.
Brown eyes hide mascara’s aim
Very well woven Henry!! Awesome way to say.. Love, you do lie..
hugs xox
I loved this! Awesome style, very cool
bravo, wonderful again
Nice work Henry...you bring much to your work with living and experiencing the world from various points of view....and now in Montreal...a wonderful adventures life...thank you so much for your vists...blessings..bkm
as i read the words seem to pick up speed and cascade down to the edge of a waterfall...
"Deceitfulness is a beauty I cannot tame.
Why even try?
Love,
you lie."
oooh, i love that! stunning! stunning! stunning!
Great rhythm and rhyme.
Thought provoking poem. Beauty certainly is the challenge we accept and the gamble we endure.
-William Leed-
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